4 key reasons why NFTs fucking suck donkey dick

Yes, the all-trendy NFTs. Who doesn’t love to hate them? There are so many embroiled problems with these fucking monkey jpegs already that counting them would take an Herculean task to write an article about all of them. But let’s cut to the chase: you wanna seriously know why the bleeding blockchain bloody bullshit is such a terrible thing?

In retrospect, NFTs are a literal Ponzi scheme or a Bigger Fool scam where it’s held under so much market speculation it literally destroys the planet (no, seriously!). Not to mention the people behind it act like this NFT business is a fucking cult.

Let’s start counting some of the main reasons why NFTs are shit, shall we?

#1: They are destroying your planet

“One Bored Ape Yacht Club monkey, please.”

The inherent problem of mass-processing computer magic in a bazillion computers is that, eventually, the energy consumption of such processing will end up using so much fossil fuel energy it literally will end up with our coastlines reducing to the Waterworld universe.

Now, would you believe me when I say that cryptomining, as such processing, especially under big GPU cryptomining farms, would equate in pollution to a dozen countries worth of pollution? You crypto evangelists wouldn’t believe me, but it’s fucking true. Wow. Now, we all know ever since Bitcoin mining was a thing that the electricity consumption from such a thing would skyrocket unnaturally:

The gargantuan energy consumption of Bitcoin just coincided with the rising prices of Bitcoin in USD. Now imagine this but with ETH and all what NFTs really imply: with all these goons mining ETH in order to afford the next Cryptopunk shithead worth hundreds of thousands of dollars, you’d have to (un)rest assured that the energy consumption will keep rising, and the increasing demand of energy will demand more pollution from energy companies it will literally destroy our planet.

#2: They are a scam

Welcome to the real world, amigo.

In a crypto world prevalent of rug pulls, art theft, and so on, you’d be a fool to not believe that the NFT world would be riddled with scams and bad actors to the brim. This is not just a problem of a few bad apples; the scammy nature of NFTs dominates the whole NFT market.

It’s not just that, but the mere act of investing in an NFT and desperately trying to make a return to that investment by reselling that NFT you invested in is just the art of the scam itself: it’s a bigger fool scam, designed so the last in acquiring such NFT will be the biggest sucker ever. Even some fuckers like Cryptopunks owners and such will re-buy to themselves their own NFTs to inflate artificially the price of such NFT to the point of making it look like it’s a rare and super-valuable thing, when it’s really not.

And that’s just the tip of the iceberg on the scammy practices that NFTs involve. If this doesn’t really convince you to stay away from NFTs entirely, just do some research or hammer your brain with a hammer, honestly, check yourself with a therapist even. Everyone in the right mind who’s not an NFT grifter will tell you not to touch these goddamn things.

#3: They are fucking ugly

Jesus fucking Christ…

We all know art is subjective, and yes, I am not the best artist myself, but if I were to tell the quality of NFTs themselves as art, I’d say that near all of them have that artistic quality below the sort of one you’d find in clipart. They are meant in every artistic aspect to be a consumption product with no aesthetic value, they look ugly on purpose even. Why sell such unappealing shit, then? Money, of course.

#4: They are involved with nazis

I’d travel back in time to tell Adolf Hitler they would be selling his image under a polluting scheme in the future, just to see his face as he rages and breaks everything knowing his life is fucked. Then I’d not need to watch Downfall again.

You knew this one was obvious.

I don’t need to explain to you that people like Stonetoss or Sam Hyde are involved in these sorts of schemes. I don’t even need to explain how there are a bazillion Hitler NFTs around on OpenSea. The case is evident and crystal-clear: nazis love NFTs.

Why? Well, for multiple reasons, but especially because all the rage we make about these is a perfect weapon for neo-nazis to weaponize our hatred for NFTs in the “culture war”. Now, obviously, we’d know that this makes them look even more stupid than the actual cryptobros, but think about this: I already talked about Bored Ape Yacht Club has ties with neo-nazism, right? Well, this NFT tech is already being used by corporations like EA, Ubisoft, Konami, Take-Two and Square Enix.

And that’s pretty scary.