I usually play 7 Wonders Duel at my BFF’s home every once in a while, I can’t say I’m good at it, neither he is, but basic gist of it: it’s fun. Of course any of us two could win by the most bullshit way, but even then, fucking each other up in this game is pretty insanely fun.

However, my BFF has tested positive for COVID-19, so now I cannot go to my BFF’s house anymore to play this. The only option I got to play 7 Wonders Duel, especially being confined at home while waiting for PCR tests and the sort and being a bored piece of shit is by playing online. Board Game Arena is one of those sites where you could play games like 7 Wonders Duel, Splendor and so on online with anybody around the world.

There’s a downside to this though: to play 7 Wonders Duel specifically, you have to need Premium at Board Game Arena, and to have premium there, you need to pay $5/month there. That’s another spending I have to count with on top of my other financial problems, but it’s not much, so I get premium. But this is only the beginning of the nightmare.

Playing matches with random nerd strangers online is a fucking nightmare to try to beat. These fucking people you’re playing against are probably way better than you are at playing this game, and they’ll have no regrets in smashing you with all sorts of bullshit ways to win: via scientific victory, or military victory. Even if you’re way ahead in points, they’ll catch you always off-guard to pull you a magic trick off their sleeve like Houdini would roll on his fucking grave.

Hoarding the starting resources to death, hoarding gold… they got you, and I swear to Jim Flynn that if I ever get beaten at this game by yet another bullshit victory, I’m going to travel through the Net physically, come out of their screen and kick their goddamn groin.

Maybe I’m sort of bad at this game, again, when I was playing with my BFF I wouldn’t obviously win more than he does, but this, my friends, when playing online at this game, is pretty much bullshit.